Children (39)
As for those parents who will not use the rod upon their children, I pray God He useth not their children as a rod for them.
Thomas Fuller
A Puritan Golden Treasury The primary place for children to receive formative instruction is in the home. Sunday school, VBS, Christian summer camp, Christian school, or even your church's youth programs cannot replace the family. The home is the place where we present a culture that is distinctly Christian.
Somehow we have come to believe that children are a burden instead of a blessing. If our churches are going to stem the tide of cultural and moral decay, we must change our disposition toward children. We decry the work of abortionists but seldom say a word to the intentionally childless couples who slay even the possibility of life in the womb.Family Driven Faith
Our children are falling away because we are asking the church to do what God designed the family to accomplish.Family Driven Faith
We cannot continue to send our children to Caesar for their education and be surprised when they come home as Romans.Family Driven Faith
I am convinced that holding men accountable for the evangelism and discipleship of their families does more to motivate and engage them than any weekly Bible study ever could.Family Driven Faith
Give me the man around whom the children come, like flies around a honey-pot: they are first-class judges of a good man.Lectures to my Students
Stripes must not be bestowed except for some great offence, and that too, should not be done in the father's anger, but moderately; not to mar, but to amend them. Let the parents always remember that golden saying of St. Paul, "Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger." The Decades https://www.monergism.com/decades-ebook
I have to say something, in what is left, touching the correction of those that are included under the name of children. This correction consists partly in words, and partly in stripes. In both there must be a middle-mean and measure, do that nothing is done outrageously. Do not let the admonition that is given in words be more bitter than the fault deserves. Let it nip for the time present; but being past, let it be spoken of no more.The Decades https://www.monergism.com/decades-ebook
One great fault in many of our churches is that the children are left for the young people to take care of; the older members, who have more wisdom, taking but very little notice of them;
We Christians are to remind ourselves of who and what we are: children of God. It is only as we remember this and live accordingly that we shall live the righteous life and advance toward holiness.
those who are devoted to idleness and laziness and shun the sweat and toil of marriage. But the purpose of marriage is not to have pleasure and to be idle but to procreate and bring up children, to support a household.... Those who have no love for children are swine, stocks, and logs unworthy of being called men or women; for they despise the blessing of God, the Creator and Author of marriage.Genesis 26–30, pp. 363
I believe the church's emphasis ought to be on equipping parents to disciple their children instead of doing it on their behalf. Family Driven Faith
It is not the job of the youth pastor to evangelize my child—that's my job. It is not the youth pastor's job to equip (disciple) my child—it's mine. And it is not the youth pastor's job to send my child out to engage the world; you guessed it—that's my job too.Family Driven Faith
Do everything in your power to place your child in an educational environment that supplements and facilitates their discipleship. Do everything in your power to avoid the influence of government schools that are incapable of bringing our children up in "the discipline and instruction of the Lord" (Ephesians 6:4)Family Driven Faith
The Fifth Commandment was the foundation upon which the concept of multigenerational faithfulness is built. God designed the family to disciple children and insure the faithfulness and perpetuation of the community of faith throughout the ages.Family Driven Faith
it is important to teach our children that every instruction is to be obeyed right away. As they get older, they may be allowed to enter into discussion about our instructions, but that discussion should follow an act of obedience, not determine whether or not they are convinced of our position.Family Driven Faith
A family without a commitment to the God of the Bible has no hope of stemming the tide of cultural onslaught. If we mix a little biblical truth, a little secular psychology, a little romance novel ideology, and a little eastern mysticism, we will get a deadly mixture of lies. Unfortunately, this is exactly what many Christian families do. We do marriage according to Dr. Phil, raise our children according to Dr. Spock, govern our sex lives according to Dr. Ruth, and only run to Dr. Jesus when things have gotten so bad we can't find another doctor to help us.Family Driven Faith
The size of our families has become a matter of income and convenience. Our attitude toward children is, "A boy for me and a girl for you, then praise the Lord, we're finally through!" I am amazed at the number of people I meet who live in two-thousand-square-foot homes with two cars parked outside and argue that they can only "afford" to have one or two children. Amazing! Our forebears successfully raised houses full of children in homes that we would now consider meager at best, but we can't afford it.Family Driven Faith
Modern American dating is no more than glorified divorce practice. Young people are learning how to give themselves away in exclusive, romantic, highly committed (at times sexual) relationships, only to break up and do it all over again. God never intended for His kids to live like this. And instead of stepping in and doing something, many Christian parents simply view these types of relationships as a normal and necessary part of growing up. Unless your child is wiser than Solomon, stronger than Samson, and more godly than David (all of whom sinned sexually), they are susceptible to sexual sin, and these premature relationships serve as open invitations.Family Driven Faith
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let him charge and see that his children go to the holy congregation to be instructed in religion there, by the public preacher. Yet nevertheless, let the father examine his children at home, and know what they have learned by hearing the sermon. Let both the father and mother also at home privately endeavour to teach their children the Ten Commandments, the Apostles' Creed, and the Lord's prayer; and let them teach them a brief and ready rule out of the scriptures for understanding the sacraments. Let them often and many times cause them to repeat the catechism, and beat into their heads such sentences as are most necessary to put them in memory of their faith and duty of life. The Decades https://www.monergism.com/decades-ebook
Let the father instruct his children in manners. From our birth, we are all clownish and rude; and all children have unseemly and uncivil manners. This evil is doubled by evil custom and clownish company. Let the parents, therefore, teach their children manners early, which may adorn them at home, and become them abroad. Let him instruct the child how to behave himself decently in his going and in the posture of his body: how in the church, how in the market, how at the table, how in men's companies, and in all other places of company. The Decades https://www.monergism.com/decades-ebook
let the father place his children with expert and cunning 570 workmen, to teach them some handicraft by which to earn their living another day. But first, he must test their wits, to see which each child is most apt for, and in which the child most delights. For "cunning will never be attained, where good will is lacking in the one that must learn it." If you have any children fit for learning, you will do a good and godly deed, to train them up to the ministry of the church, or some other office that stands by learning. But of all others, fault is to be found with those parents who bring up their children in lazy idleness. For, even if huge heaps of treasure were left to them, yet in three or four odd hours all may be wasted and come to nothing. To what, then, will your dainty idle gentleman trust — what will he do — when there is nothing left but his bare carcass, which is a lump of clay and not good for anything? The inhabiters of Massilia would not admit anyone to citizenship, except those who had learned an occupation to live by. 571 For there is no greater plague to a city than an unprofitable citizen.The Decades https://www.monergism.com/decades-ebook
If I teach my son to keep his eye on the ball but fail to teach him to keep his eyes on Christ, I have failed as a father.Family Driven Faith
our children's education is not our primary goal. Our primary goal for our children is that they walk with the Lord.Family Driven Faith
Unfortunately, this is a foreign concept to most Christians in our culture. Most pastoral search committees never even bother to meet a man's wife and children, let alone observe him at home or question those close enough to know how he teaches the Word to his family, leads them in family worship, disciplines, instructs, and encourages his children, or loves his wife. This may seem like a separate issue, but I assure you it is right on point. The fact that we no longer require exemplary family life from those who lead us is indicative of the fact that we have dropped the ball on this issue from the top down. In fact the term preacher's kid has become a euphemism for the poorly behaved, rebellious, oft-neglected sons and daughters of our leaders. If our leaders are failing as husbands and fathers, what hope is there for the rest of our families?Family Driven Faith
my family is the primary place where my walk with Christ takes on flesh. It is one thing for me to have a personal relationship with Jesus. However, if I spend hours reading the Bible and praying and invest the lion's share of my time ministering to others while neglecting my role as husband and father, my relationship with Christ is out of balance or, worse, inauthentic.Family Driven Faith
The problem is not that these children are leaving Christianity. The problem is that most of them, by their own admission, are not Christian!Family Driven Faith
The key is to understand that our children don't belong to us—they belong to God. Our goal as parents must not be limited by our own vision. I am a finite, sinful, selfish man. Why would I want to plan out my children's future when I can entrust them to the infinite, omnipotent, immutable, sovereign Lord of the universe? I don't want to tell God what to do with my children—I want Him to tell me!Family Driven Faith
If Psalm 1 is to be believed, we must not allow our children to stand, sit or walk with those who deny biblical truth and morality. Instead, we must place them in situations that will aid them in meditating on the law of the Lord 'day and night.' Surely this involves how and where they are to be educated.Family Driven Faith
Parents cannot give grace to their children, but may by prayer bring them to the God of grace, and shall not seek him in vain, for their prayer shall either be answered or it shall return with comfort into their own bosom.
For children are innocent and love justice, while most of us are wicked and naturally prefer mercy.
Because children have abounding vitality, because they are in spirit fierce and free, therefore they want things repeated and unchanged. They always say, "Do it again"; and the grown-up person does it again until he is nearly dead. For grown-up people are not strong enough to exult in monotony. But perhaps God is strong enough to exult in monotony. It is possible that God says every morning, "Do it again" to the sun; and every evening, "Do it again" to the moon. It may not be automatic necessity that makes all daisies alike; it may be that God makes every daisy separately, but has never got tired of making them. It may be that He has the eternal appetite of infancy; for we have sinned and grown old, and our Father is younger than we.
If a parent were explicitly to ask the question of a fair and plain-speaking friend, familiar with that parent's children, and competent to judge them, What do you think is the chief fault - or the most objectionable characteristic - of my son - or daughter ? the frank answer to that question would in very many cases be an utter surprise to the parent, the fault or characteristic named not having been suspected by the parent. A child may be so much like the parent just here, that the parent's blindness to his or her own chief fault or lack may forbid the seeing of the child's similar deformity.Hints on Child Training, 34
The unfriendly criticisms of neighbors, and the kind suggestions of friends, are not to be despised by a parent in making up an estimate of his child's failings and faults.Hints on Child Training, 32-33
But if a boy has a bright mind and positive preferences, and is ready to study or to work untiringly in the line of his own tastes, and in no other line, it does not always occur to his parents that just here - in this reluctance to apply himself in the line of wise expediency rather than of personal fancy - there is a failing which, if not trained out of that boy, will stand as a barrier to his truest manhood, and will make him a second-rate man when he might be a first-rate one; a one-sided man instead of a well-proportioned man. Such a boy is quite likely to be looked upon as one who must be permitted to have his own way, since that way is evidently not a bad way, and he shows unusual power in its direction.Hints on Child Training, 32
Something really seems wrong to me when parents want to take their children in the most formative years and put them with other children and other adults to shape their attitude and behavior in worship rather than having them right there to shape them. Why wouldn't parents be jealous to model for their children the tremendous value that they put on joyful reverence in the presence of almighty God?http://www.desiringgod.org/interviews/should-children-sit-through-big-church
Of course, it is over their head. It is supposed to be over their head. They are beginners. The English language is over their head as soon as they come out of the womb. But we don't say: Well, let's put them with other children in their own situations and limitations so they can understand a word or two. No. We immerse them in the English language every day that they don't understand 90% of in the hope and expectation that they grow up into joyful use of the English language. Long before children understand fully what is going on in worship and what is sung and what is said, they are absorbing tremendous amounts of what is valuable.http://www.desiringgod.org/interviews/should-children-sit-through-big-church
The greatest stumbling block for children in worship is parents who don't cherish doing that worship, they don't love it, children can feel the difference between duty and delight. They know if Dad loves being here.http://www.desiringgod.org/interviews/should-children-sit-through-big-church
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